Friday 100226

Preheat:

• Check website.
  
• Be sure it’s an easy WOD before committing to your health.
• Double check to sure you’re not at the least bit tired or sore. Sleeping in is always better than sucking it up and getting it done.
  
• Make sure there isn’t something else to do so you can rationalize away coming to the gym. There must some phone call or something you absolutely have to do at the time you could be getting stronger, faster, leaner and more confident.
  
• Be sure to stay home if there is even a dusting of snow/if its raining/too windy/too cold/too hot. Remember to stay in your comfort zone at all costs. Nothing good ever comes from pushing yourself past your limits and breaking down barriers.
  
• Eat a plate of refined sugar and pure gluten. It’s so much easier than all this ‘cooking’ crap. Just stop off at the Stop & Slop and get your disease on. Longevity takes too long.
  
• Chase down  a handful of ibuprofen with a ‘diet soda’. They really do keep you lean, healthy, injury free and feeling wonderful all the time. Be sure to take an ‘energy drink’ in case there is any doubt.
  
• Avoid offers of going running, biking, swimming, hiking, etc. by telling folks you’re too sore from doing CrossFit.
• If all else fails,  come to the gym 15 minutes late and scale the workout down to lifting Kleenex boxes and doing half range of motion assisted by a forklift. If it feels heavy, it must be bad for you. Strength comes from lifting really light weights for high reps.
• When in doubt, use a thigh master, or a bicep isolation exercise. Nothing is more important than having skinny legs or a big bicep.
• Remember you can just do ‘cardio’ and some light lifting, because it’s getting you to your fitness goals just fine, right?
  
• Take water breaks between every rep during the WOD and be sure to chalk twice before every lift. The best way to get healthy is stay comfortable and take the path of least resistance. Really.
  

WOD

• ‘Cherry Pick’
  • Make coffee
    
  • Hand out copies of NY Times
    
  • Sit in easy-chairs to discuss the news of the day
  • Watch your progress scream to a halt.
    
• We might permit SOME discussion of ‘exercise’ but only as it refers to easy things that don’t make you sweat or feel uncomfortable in any way. Please bring fuzzy-bunny slippers and robe or tie dyed snuggie. There will be no reference what so ever to ‘working @#$%! hard’ or ‘doing your best’ or ‘never giving up, giving in, avoiding the hard path’.
  
• Best thing for you if your tired or sore is to just sit back and relax. The best things in life are easy. Nothing can be gained from giving everything you do 100% effort, no excuses, no backing down, giving no quarter, facing down your demons and crushing them with the iron fist of commitment to being the very best at every thing you do. Really.

..

Dessert

Who is today’ s workout for? If you laughed a bit, then its not for you. You know your bringing your best every time. If it made you uncomfortable, or even pissed you off every so slightly, maybe today’s workout was  a call to arms, a wake-up call to recommit yourself to why you train in the first place. What goals are still out there to grab? What will the next three months bring you? Health? Strength? Confidence? Will what you do here bleed through to the rest of your life? Yes. Most definitely, regardless of whether you’re pushing it to be better than your best, or whether you’re just coasting. Which would you rather be? You know where you are, you know where you want to go. Now go.

The best part of what you do here is that you DO it. We have an awesome group of folks here that push themselves every day in every way and it’s a humbling sight to see. As a group you have come so far, so fast, you inspire me to be better at what I do, to fight harder and go faster. You really do give it your best, I can tell by your data, you wouldn’t be crushing your past numbers like you do if you weren’t in this 100%, for the long haul.

IF it’s not hard, if it’s not a struggle, if staying home and hitting the sofa for max time  doesn’t sound glorious? Then you’re not giving it your all. Are you getting what you wanted from your fitness? WHY not?! Look, fact is life is better when you’re strong and fast, it’s precisely what the human condition was meant to be. Life is better when you do the hard things simply because they are hard. No one ever celebrates the easy things in life. Ever give someone a ‘high five’ when you decided to blow off a workout? Ever hug the person next to you when you got off of an elliptical machine after doing 60% effort for an hour? Ever want to call and tell your friends and colleagues how easy your workout was? Ever post on your face book page how your workout left you bone dry, wanting more and not in the least bit sore?

You get out what you put in. Push the limits, push yourself. Nothing but good will come from that…